Do you still like him?

No. I miss him occasionally though. Funny how he was tangible just a month ago and now he's just some guy in my head. I barely remember how he sounds like, how exactly he looks like but one thing is I can still remember his smile. And his sharp nose. Basically, everything that I stored in my head and labeled as "Memory" is slowly being passed to the shredders.

At first it was really hard when I stored him freshly in my head. He kept knocking on the memory door forcing me to open it. Constantly knocking and knocking. But as the day passed, the knocking has slowed down. Sometimes I could resist opening the door but there are times I willingly open it. Just so I don't forget him. I mean, he was something real before this.

I can't control what goes up there. I can't control who stays and who goes. If you choose to stay, good; if not then, up there you go. And I'll pray I don't store you so deep that I forget the good things. Like his smile. And his nose. I never want to forget those. But I can't save his voice. I don't know where it is.

And all these. They're precious to me. Any little thing I could keep, I would. Just so I would remember him. Remember that he was real. I'm not going to change the name for some time cause if I do then that means I'm ready to forget. But the thing is, I'm not ready yet. I'm still hoping. I'm still holding onto that twig even though I know it can't support me and I'm about to fall down a cliff. But I'm just gonna hold on. Just hoping.